today was an interesting "end of an era." i closed an email and blog account i have owned, for the past 12 years. i copied and saved everyone of my writings, but i released my emails into the forgotten past. i realized that though it was time to terminate the account, it was also time to move beyond the memories it carried. sometimes our emotional and mental space is like our home storage. at some point, we have to throw things out or give them away. if we hold onto EVERYTHING FOREVER, we simply clutter our lives and prevent ourselves from being able to welcome that which is new.
seekinghiswill
i still am, but i've ceased making it my online identity.
goodbye high school and college. it was nice.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
The Pathway to Uncovering...
I'm on a great adventure.
Well, I have been for sometime, but I got a bit sidetracked and forgot that I'd been commissioned for such a great work.
I work for the One To Whom I Cling, uncovering things.
Certainly, nothing is hidden from Him. Why would He require things to be uncovered? Because it's not for Him. It's for me. He knows and sees all, but sometimes, from my human perspective, those things aren't so obvious. So, He's invited me to use His tools (shovel, bucket, brushes) and do a bit of excavation. I guess I have been hired as a sort of spiritual archeologist. And, it is so interesting! There are multiple discoveries EVERYDAY! It is the best gig I've ever had. It's productive, it's inspirational, it's rewarding. I can't imagine why I had forgotten the work...I wasted time. But, the great part about this role is that OTWIC doesn't allow ANYTHING to be wasted. He redeems time and energy, so now that I'm back on the job, I'm getting enough done to make up for past absence.
Each day, I dig, I brush away, and I chronicle what I've found. But the amazing difference between my work and an actual archeologist is that my discoveries allude to further hidden mysteries. I can actually infer what I might find next, from something I've already found. Moreover, I KNOW that I'll find the rest of the missing pieces. They haven't been eaten by the earth, like some fossils. Every single part is available, if I just keep digging. And, as I go, my discoveries bring me closer to OTWIC, because they are all linked to WHO HE IS! Isn't that incredible?! So, I not only get to find out mind-blowing new things, about life, history, and the future, but I am simultaneously growing in my relationship with my boss. He spends every moment with me, while I uncover and helps me understand what I've found.
I think there may be more available positions. I'll check with Him and let you know.
Honestly, you don't want to miss this opportunity. Oh, and don't worry about your skill set. No prior experience is needed. You learn, on the job...
Well, I have been for sometime, but I got a bit sidetracked and forgot that I'd been commissioned for such a great work.
I work for the One To Whom I Cling, uncovering things.
Certainly, nothing is hidden from Him. Why would He require things to be uncovered? Because it's not for Him. It's for me. He knows and sees all, but sometimes, from my human perspective, those things aren't so obvious. So, He's invited me to use His tools (shovel, bucket, brushes) and do a bit of excavation. I guess I have been hired as a sort of spiritual archeologist. And, it is so interesting! There are multiple discoveries EVERYDAY! It is the best gig I've ever had. It's productive, it's inspirational, it's rewarding. I can't imagine why I had forgotten the work...I wasted time. But, the great part about this role is that OTWIC doesn't allow ANYTHING to be wasted. He redeems time and energy, so now that I'm back on the job, I'm getting enough done to make up for past absence.
Each day, I dig, I brush away, and I chronicle what I've found. But the amazing difference between my work and an actual archeologist is that my discoveries allude to further hidden mysteries. I can actually infer what I might find next, from something I've already found. Moreover, I KNOW that I'll find the rest of the missing pieces. They haven't been eaten by the earth, like some fossils. Every single part is available, if I just keep digging. And, as I go, my discoveries bring me closer to OTWIC, because they are all linked to WHO HE IS! Isn't that incredible?! So, I not only get to find out mind-blowing new things, about life, history, and the future, but I am simultaneously growing in my relationship with my boss. He spends every moment with me, while I uncover and helps me understand what I've found.
I think there may be more available positions. I'll check with Him and let you know.
Honestly, you don't want to miss this opportunity. Oh, and don't worry about your skill set. No prior experience is needed. You learn, on the job...
Friday, January 22, 2010
Am I French, or not?!
2007...
Francis Coppola...
Diamond Series...
Claret...
Rich, plum appearance...unbelievable clarity...vibrant and fresh, on the nose...rich and full-bodied with medium tannins...spice and cherry flavors...ridiculously long finish...a moment on the palate, forever in the memory...
Need I say more?
Thursday, January 21, 2010
יהוה שמרך יהוה
צלך על־יד ימינך׃
יומם השמש לא־יככה
וירח בלילה׃
צלך על־יד ימינך׃
יומם השמש לא־יככה
וירח בלילה׃
Yahweh is your keeper. Yahweh is your shade on your right hand.
The sun will not harm you by day, Nor the moon by night.
Psalm 121: 5,6
Psalm 121: 5,6
What an awesome God we serve?! He is so intimately acquainted with ALL of our ways. He is Ever-Present and Ever-Strong, ready to take on our foes, and avenge our challenges, with a moment's notice. This Great God of ours is the God who fashioned the earth: who separated night from day and caused the waters of the seas to part. And yet, daily, He reveals Himself as our "shamar", our keeper, the One who guards and protects us like a watchman or shepherd. He knows our number and our value, within His flock. And this same God, not only watches but actively protects, our "Tzal," the Shadow that covers and envelopes us in safety and defense. He is not overcome by His Creation, but He cares for and preserves it. Therefore, I WILL NOT be AFRAID of the sun or moon, of my friends or enemies. For My Lord, ADONAI, Maker of Heaven and Earth, is not to be trampled upon by what He has made. No! He calls all things into His care and under His Authority. Hallelujah!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Office Space
Well, we are still in process of rearranging, but already - just 2 weeks into the New Year - I believe we will have an office that is practically usable, while tripling as a music studio and guest bedroom.
It's good to have "Days off with Hubby."
It's gonna be a good year...
It's good to have "Days off with Hubby."
It's gonna be a good year...
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
The Release...
Sometimes I realize that I need to let go of what I've imagined life will be...
Sometimes I get ahead of God, or just assume I know where He's going...
Sometimes I forget that my interpretation of His Voice is limited by my human understanding, jaded by my emotions and experiences...
Sometimes I remember that if He is Truly God and Truly Good and that He's ALWAYS been faithful, I don't have to fret now, even though I might not comprehend why I hear and see what occurs around me...
Sometimes I have to release my desires, my will, my intentions and agendas, my hopes and fears - I have to release them all into His Hands and continue to trust that ALL WILL BE as He has Promised, though we can never fully know what that means without the journey...
Sometimes I get ahead of God, or just assume I know where He's going...
Sometimes I forget that my interpretation of His Voice is limited by my human understanding, jaded by my emotions and experiences...
Sometimes I remember that if He is Truly God and Truly Good and that He's ALWAYS been faithful, I don't have to fret now, even though I might not comprehend why I hear and see what occurs around me...
Sometimes I have to release my desires, my will, my intentions and agendas, my hopes and fears - I have to release them all into His Hands and continue to trust that ALL WILL BE as He has Promised, though we can never fully know what that means without the journey...
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Monday, February 23, 2009
I learned something new today...
...about Coquina (pronounced "Koh-kee-nah") rocks. They're found by the sea, comprised of shells that have been broken down and mashed together over time. So, essentially, it's a type of petrification, except that they're already composed of hard, rock-like materials.
Oh, I suppose that Wikepedia could do a better job.
So, just enjoy the pictures:)
Oh, I suppose that Wikepedia could do a better job.
So, just enjoy the pictures:)
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Deja Vu?
Well...almost.
Two years ago, while on a respite from my volunteer work in Israel, I took a temporary job at a Panera Bread (a.k.a. "St. Louis Bread Company") in Columbus, Ohio. It was a great job with the pay that I needed, at the time, and an opportunity to meet some friends that I still know, to this day. I enjoyed and valued their in-depth training process and their seeming willingness to remain flexible with my travel schedule.
So, when my husband and I realized, three weeks ago, that I would need to go back to work, for a season, I headed for the nearest Bread Co. Housed within a little plaza, just 15 minutes walk from our apartment, I thought that it would be the perfect fit.
I started training this last week and it's been a bit surreal. I continue to sit through and read through materials that are all too familiar. Some things have changed, since 2006, but for the most part, it's just a different state and a bit more of a busy store.
It's been a blast from the past that somehow holds my future. I am thankful for people and an opportunity to be character stretched, as it's been quite a "trying" week. This is where I presently find myself planted and I want to blossom here.
G-d is good and I can do nothing but thank Him for, once again, giving us the provision we need for this time.
Two years ago, while on a respite from my volunteer work in Israel, I took a temporary job at a Panera Bread (a.k.a. "St. Louis Bread Company") in Columbus, Ohio. It was a great job with the pay that I needed, at the time, and an opportunity to meet some friends that I still know, to this day. I enjoyed and valued their in-depth training process and their seeming willingness to remain flexible with my travel schedule.
So, when my husband and I realized, three weeks ago, that I would need to go back to work, for a season, I headed for the nearest Bread Co. Housed within a little plaza, just 15 minutes walk from our apartment, I thought that it would be the perfect fit.
I started training this last week and it's been a bit surreal. I continue to sit through and read through materials that are all too familiar. Some things have changed, since 2006, but for the most part, it's just a different state and a bit more of a busy store.
It's been a blast from the past that somehow holds my future. I am thankful for people and an opportunity to be character stretched, as it's been quite a "trying" week. This is where I presently find myself planted and I want to blossom here.
G-d is good and I can do nothing but thank Him for, once again, giving us the provision we need for this time.
My God shall supply all my needs according to his riches and glory, in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19
Philippians 4:19
Monday, February 16, 2009
VALENTINE BLISS - A Tribute to the LOVES of my life...
This weekend has been amazing: full of life and love and memory-making. And, it was all made possible by, not one, but three people. They are the three men in my life: T-LOMS, Avi, and My Darling One.
T-LOMS
The first, and most prominent, is actually not man at all, but the shaper of men: ADONAI, The Lover of my Soul. I know and experience love, everyday, because HE exudes it and teaches it to my heart and the hearts of other. He embodies love, referred to in I John as BEING love, Himself. He therefore is the SOURCE for love’s distribution: the Great Warehouse from which we all acquire the level of love we each need and give (if we are willing to recognize Him). He plays the greatest role of love, because I know that without Him, I am not capable of accurately giving OR receiving love. Why? Because, as scripture states: We love because He first loved us... While I realize that passage specifically makes reference to the exchange of love between me and TOTWIC, it also implies further ripples of love’s affects, such as our relationship to those around us. I know my SOURCE as Father, Lover, and Faithful Friend. From HIS absolutely unconditional love, I have learned the value in its generous and humble expression and how to appreciate the way I am embraced by others. He is THE standard and has formed my identity and my opinion of what REAL LOVE should be.
Avi
In Hebrew, it means “my father,” and it is the term I have come to use when making reference to, or addressing, the earthly embodiment of this role. My father is one of the most amazing men I have ever encountered: intelligent, humble, loving, and true. He is consistent in character, only changing when it means GROWTH. I admire him among my heroes and love him dearly, because, second to T-LOMS, he has taught me how to give and receive love. Shadowing the attributes of his HEAVENLY example, my father has shared his life and love, with his family: asking nothing in return, sincerely satisfied in our delight. He has tangibly shown his feelings and commitment with words and gestures of affection and intention. One such gesture - tradition for nearly 18 years - is the bestowing of a heart-shaped box of chocolate truffles on each of his girls. Though only made of sugar and bean (and known for fading with time), these cocoa-based delights have thrilled our hearts and spirits for almost two decades. Because, the value lies not in the gesture alone, but in the meaning behind the action: in the symbol behind the deed. For it speaks of his interest in our lives and his knowledge of past and future input. For many year, he WAS our only Valentine. We are both married now, having found our forever loves, but even with these shifts of directed dedication, Avi is unchanged.
When I received my box, this year, I was surprised and emotional to discover that he would still impart such a gift to one who no longer falls under his covering. Through teary words, I thanked him and communicated the value of this annual treasure. He said that his track-record has been “too good” and though we have grown, and roles have shifted, he has no plans to cease this habit in the future. My heart was warmed. What a gift I have, not in a mere box of chocolates, but in the man that taught me life’s real sweetness is found in love, not inside a candy shell!
My Darling One
The most recent addition to my line-up of cherished men is my beloved husband. He is the culmination of the roles and lessons played and given by T-LOMS and Avi. And, I am able to exchange love with him, because of the way they each faithfully taught me. With reception of Stevie’s love, my cup is full. I waited for his love the longest, for his role to come and complete my life. Not that completion can be found in man alone, but rather that I knew a promise, from T-LOMS, was yet to be fulfilled in the person of my husband. He is now my daily link to the flesh of ADONAI’s love and the continuation of the covering love my father has always given. He was approved and blessed by both, so I know that his love can be trusted, because I trust their love explicitly. I am grateful to know a man who is both lover yet friend, leader yet partner. He is my joy and my delight. He is my forever valentine, the one whom G-d has called to finish life’s lesson of love. And, while many classes still lie ahead, I am confident that his life will prove to be the greatest journey I have yet encountered. To love him is to know happiness and to be loved by him is to understand sincerity.
I am blessed among women! For, I have the love of THREE incredible men. I have a foundation, a structure, and a breathing reality of what LOVE truly is. My heart is full, my spirit rejoices, and my life knows no boundary of satisfaction, because I have been loved in the truest way and it has shaped my very being. And everyday, therefore, is my Valentine’s Day.
T-LOMS
The first, and most prominent, is actually not man at all, but the shaper of men: ADONAI, The Lover of my Soul. I know and experience love, everyday, because HE exudes it and teaches it to my heart and the hearts of other. He embodies love, referred to in I John as BEING love, Himself. He therefore is the SOURCE for love’s distribution: the Great Warehouse from which we all acquire the level of love we each need and give (if we are willing to recognize Him). He plays the greatest role of love, because I know that without Him, I am not capable of accurately giving OR receiving love. Why? Because, as scripture states: We love because He first loved us... While I realize that passage specifically makes reference to the exchange of love between me and TOTWIC, it also implies further ripples of love’s affects, such as our relationship to those around us. I know my SOURCE as Father, Lover, and Faithful Friend. From HIS absolutely unconditional love, I have learned the value in its generous and humble expression and how to appreciate the way I am embraced by others. He is THE standard and has formed my identity and my opinion of what REAL LOVE should be.
Thank you, LORD, for BEING LOVE and teaching me it’s true form.
Avi
In Hebrew, it means “my father,” and it is the term I have come to use when making reference to, or addressing, the earthly embodiment of this role. My father is one of the most amazing men I have ever encountered: intelligent, humble, loving, and true. He is consistent in character, only changing when it means GROWTH. I admire him among my heroes and love him dearly, because, second to T-LOMS, he has taught me how to give and receive love. Shadowing the attributes of his HEAVENLY example, my father has shared his life and love, with his family: asking nothing in return, sincerely satisfied in our delight. He has tangibly shown his feelings and commitment with words and gestures of affection and intention. One such gesture - tradition for nearly 18 years - is the bestowing of a heart-shaped box of chocolate truffles on each of his girls. Though only made of sugar and bean (and known for fading with time), these cocoa-based delights have thrilled our hearts and spirits for almost two decades. Because, the value lies not in the gesture alone, but in the meaning behind the action: in the symbol behind the deed. For it speaks of his interest in our lives and his knowledge of past and future input. For many year, he WAS our only Valentine. We are both married now, having found our forever loves, but even with these shifts of directed dedication, Avi is unchanged.
When I received my box, this year, I was surprised and emotional to discover that he would still impart such a gift to one who no longer falls under his covering. Through teary words, I thanked him and communicated the value of this annual treasure. He said that his track-record has been “too good” and though we have grown, and roles have shifted, he has no plans to cease this habit in the future. My heart was warmed. What a gift I have, not in a mere box of chocolates, but in the man that taught me life’s real sweetness is found in love, not inside a candy shell!
Thank you, Avi, for giving form to the love ADONAI has shown...
My Darling One
The most recent addition to my line-up of cherished men is my beloved husband. He is the culmination of the roles and lessons played and given by T-LOMS and Avi. And, I am able to exchange love with him, because of the way they each faithfully taught me. With reception of Stevie’s love, my cup is full. I waited for his love the longest, for his role to come and complete my life. Not that completion can be found in man alone, but rather that I knew a promise, from T-LOMS, was yet to be fulfilled in the person of my husband. He is now my daily link to the flesh of ADONAI’s love and the continuation of the covering love my father has always given. He was approved and blessed by both, so I know that his love can be trusted, because I trust their love explicitly. I am grateful to know a man who is both lover yet friend, leader yet partner. He is my joy and my delight. He is my forever valentine, the one whom G-d has called to finish life’s lesson of love. And, while many classes still lie ahead, I am confident that his life will prove to be the greatest journey I have yet encountered. To love him is to know happiness and to be loved by him is to understand sincerity.
Thank you, My Darling One, for the love you freely give everyday, without expectation...
I am blessed among women! For, I have the love of THREE incredible men. I have a foundation, a structure, and a breathing reality of what LOVE truly is. My heart is full, my spirit rejoices, and my life knows no boundary of satisfaction, because I have been loved in the truest way and it has shaped my very being. And everyday, therefore, is my Valentine’s Day.
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